Why having a tribe is so important when dealing with grief…

Heartbeats take on Dallas, TX 05/2015

My tribe is deep.

Seriously, no one is messing wit my crew.

My support system is EVERYTHING <3

Holds me down, or up, when I didn’t/don’t want to get out of bed.  They’re able to say, “I know.  I’ve been there.  Take your time.  Every journey with grief is different.  Do you want me to listen or respond. etc.”

I remember when I found out my dad was sick.  I decided to form two or three text messaging groups via the GroupMe app.  It was easier than copying and pasting, and I didn’t want to leave anyone out.  They were able to receive the information at the same time and respond accordingly.

Listening to my deepest thoughts during a time when I was at the brink of losing my father, and it was imperative that I had their support. The thoughts that I couldn’t articulate at times in my journal because I simply needed someone to speak back to me.  Or, maybe I needed the validation, you know someone saying that, “girl you ain’t crazy, we’re here!”  I knew the time would come where I would eventually break, and my emotions would be so overwhelming that I needed my support system to catch me when I fell.

Even though those GROUPME groups are now defunct we are still in contact.  I was scrolling through my phone thinking about what I should talk about today, and I went to the GROUPME app to see if our conversations were still there, and…

Four years later…


The strength and love they provided during my time of mourning solidified our bond.  The BH/Heartbeats group are my friends from childhood (my sisters), but my Next Generation Besties are young ladies that I met during every phase of my adult life.  The NGB ladies have never met in person but I placed them in the group together because they unknowingly shared a bond with each other.  We formed a sisterhood that reaches beyond my journey with grief.

I know that some of the text message conversations that I had with people at that time are no longer around, but I didn’t forget about those intimate exchanges either.  You see, it’s important to surround yourself with people that can encourage you, and also able to identify with the loss that you have experienced.  My tribe stretches past the GROUPME messages, but it sure feels good to have the reminder of who’s always been in your corner.



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